An Open Letter to Southeast Asia Concerning the Confusion Over What Constitutes "Tea"

Dear SouthEast Asia (except you, Cameron Highlands of Malaysia, you are excused),

I am writing to you out of concern. Perhaps translation has failed us, but every time I sit down at a cafe to enjoy a hot beverage and order "tea", you unfailingly deliver to me the most dreadful of all hot drinks, the "teacino". If I had wanted this concoction, I'd have ordered a cup of tea, a cup of coffee and a cup of condensed milk and mixed them together myself.

Being such close neighbours to the great producers/consumers of tea, China and India, there is really no excuse for this substitution and stinginess. If you only offer teacino, please desist from listing it as "tea" on your menu. They are in no way the same beverage. This would save me and others a great deal of disappointment and disgust.

Regards,

Holly